This girl is more easily done than said...
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
