Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
His hands were made for my vagina.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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