I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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