oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
