if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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