So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
