thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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