I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Well I just put wine in my tea
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
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