and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
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