the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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