His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
