Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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