If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
