I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
