I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i wish my penis had a tongue
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Randomize
