no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
