I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
In America we eat man semen.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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