White coat. Heels.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize