I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
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