i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
it glows. i had to have it.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
She bit a glass in half.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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