Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I can text with my tongue
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
ttyl tear gas
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize
