Pants 0. Shit 1.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
the liver wants what the liver wants
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Randomize
