First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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