I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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