so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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