um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize