So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
