When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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