Dual....:-)
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize