Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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