Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
