Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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