quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
