Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
