Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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