I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
