$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I can't turn off my feet"
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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