I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
