Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
