I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
