he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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