Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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