ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Randomize
