The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize