Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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