i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
