Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
