connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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