'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
