I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Randomize
