He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
